Rude Christmas Poems For Kids
A small collection of funny poems for older kids. Some of the poems are really, genuinely rude, whereas others are unsuitable for younger kids because they the shatter one on the most enduring, and endearing, illusions of childhood. Are you ready to read the poems? This joke should help sort the sheep from the goats:
What's the difference between a snow man and a snow woman?
Snow balls
If you found the joke uproariously funny, or at least anatomically amusing, you're quite safe to proceed. If, on the other hand, you were bemuse, confused or gently perplexed, its perhaps best to leave the rude Christmas poems for another year.
Christmas May Be Cancelled
This opening poem, Christmas May Be Cancelled, is rather mean spirited and it is this, rather than its rudeness, which relegated it to the section devoted to rude Christmas poems. I'd like to be able to tell you it has a happy ending, but it doesn't. Well, perhaps a half-happy ending.
The Santa Clause
A rather endearing and not really rude Christmas poem, but one that is unsuitable for younger children as it explodes the whole Santa Claus thing. Exploding Santa Claus, now that sounds fun!
The Christmas Fairy
A funny Christmas poem about a Christmas fairy. Not a real fairy, but the sort of plastic, fabric and glitter Christmas fairy that sits right on the top of your Christmas tree.
Who's The New Guy?
A properly rude poem about the mysterious tenth reindeer, known as the brown nosed reindeer, who appears to help Santa Claus on his rounds at Christmas.
Happy Christmas Auntie Peggy
A Christmas poem for kids which combines humour, cruelty and prosthetic limbs - not so much a rude Christmas poem, as a twisted Christmas poem.
Santa Claus RIP
Oh no he isn't... Or is he?
Snow Show
Another very rude poem which contains no rude words at all. If you don't understand it, you won't be offended, so you're quite safe to give it a whirl.
