Funny Poems About Teachers

Our third offering of funny poems about school focuses on that most despised of school fixtures, the teachers. I know you just adore your teachers, but kind, caring, competent teachers don't make for funny poems. Instead, you'll have to suffer poems about the cruel, crazy and malodorous teachers that Paul and I suffered at school sometime during the last century.

Under Achieving

A poem about the frustrations of primary education. You're torn from the bosom of your loving family and dumped at this strange establishment (school) where every sentence spoken by a teacher begins with the words 'You must not'. And then you're told that you're facing an 11 year sentence.

The Mental Maths Teacher

Back to the relative normality of a poem about a maths lesson at school. Why is the currency of mathematics always apples? Please write your answer on one side of a grapefruit.

Star Teacher

Every so often you'll meet a teacher who can be diverted into talking about anything other than the subject they're meant to teach. Whole lessons, weeks or even terms can be spent on these idle diversions.

My Cat Story

A boy accused by his teacher of copying his brother's homework has a cast iron defence. Except that the star witness is a...

If You Ask A Stupid Question

A hilarious poem which it's wise to keep up your sleeve until that moment when you really, really want to wind your teacher up.

A Capital Offence

A funny poem in which we once again meet the hapless Miss Tibbs, who is trying to teach a point of grammar to pupils who are too bright for their own good. If a funny poem about grammar isn't enough to put you off, the poem is also extraordinarily long and the poem's title, A Capital Offence, is a little riddle which provides the answer to Miss Tibbs's initial question to the class.

Love And Kisses?

If you're alarmed by a poem about a school teacher being called Love and Kisses? you're perhaps right to be. Or is there a completely innocent explanation?

Dim Sum

A short silly poem that sums up everything I know or care about maths.

Funny Poems about School 1 | Funny Poems about School 2 | Funny Poems about Teachers