Bear Necessities

When in the North America forests
On holiday
Carry with you a whistle
And a can of pepper spray
Because you might meet a bear

A small bear eats mainly fruit
And the occasional squirrel
And can be easily scared away
With a sharp blast on your whistle
That’s how to deal with a small bear

A large bear won’t be frightened away
By a blast of your whistle
But a squirt of your pepper spray
Will do the trick not a lot just a little
That’s how to deal with a large bear

You can check if bears are in the area
By examining their droppings
If it smells of fruit
And contains squirrel fur
Then it was deposited by a small bear

However if the more dangerous large bear
Left its deposit along the way
It will probably contain a whistle
And it will smell of pepper spray

About the Poem

A joke in the form of a poem. which should probably be termed a poke (and definitely not a joem).

Category

Very Rude Funny Poems

Rating

Very rude

Style

Rhyming poem

Style

24 lines

Key Stage

KS2, KS3

Author

Paul Curtis

Copyright © Paul Curtis. All Rights Reserved

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Funny Poems and Nonsense Verse for Kids
Copyright © Funny Poems for Kids / Patrick Winstanley 2002-2015 All Rights Reserved.
Individual poems are copyright of the stated authors and used with permission