About the Poem

Most people are scared of something. I'm scared of spiders, Timmy is scared of dogs and Paul, it seems, is scared of almost everything.

Category

Rude Poems

Rating

Not very rude

Style

Rhyming poem

Author

Paul Curtis

I Do Not Like That

As by way of a general ruling
I have made this to be my doctrine
To dislike, distrust or fear
Any creature meeting these criteria
Anything with more limbs than I
Anything that moves faster than I
Anything with scales or feathers
Anything surviving extreme weathers
Anything having more teeth than I do
Anything creature covered in goo
Anything that growls and grunts
That isn’t engaged in sexual stunts
Anything with claws and talons
Anything that drools by the gallons
Anything that’s excessively hairy
Anything creature whose eyes are starey
Anything that bites or stings
Anything that uses wings
Anything with horns or armour
Anything with an aggressive demeanour
Anything too small to see
Anything that’s bigger than me
If you think of anything I've missed
Then I will add them to the list

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