Amanda Spick and Span

Amanda polished Granny’s corsets, shone up Daddy’s tie,
Vacuumed out her Mum’s best shortbread and pork and cranberry pie.
Polished up the family poodle till he shone like gold,
Bleached the goldfish, ironed the budgie, like she had been told.

What’s with all the manic cleaning, Mother did enquire,
It’s all in the Daughter’s Manual, it’s my heart’s desire.
Daughters keep a family homestead clean and spick and span,
Polish pans and launder curtains, white but never wan.

Father begged and Grandma pleaded, enough, my girl, already,
Stoop the bloomin’ awful cleaning, you’re driving us unsteady.
But Mandy went and got the Brasso, polished all the lamps,
So they took her to the pawn shop and traded her for stamps.