More Funny Animal Poems for Kids

Another amazing and varied selection of funny kids poetry about animals, which includes poems about amoebae, bees and hornets (and I know none of these are technically animals, before the smarty-pants amongst you start getting shirty).

Zebra Crossing

A gentle introduction to the poetry of Kate Williams, in the form of a funny poem about the zebra.

Hippos and Haikus

The haiku is a very special form of verse which originates in Japan. A haiku must have exactly 17 syllables, made up of three lines of five syllables, seven syllables and five syllables. Oops!

Grumpillas

Have you ever met a cantankerous gorilla? You're about to...

Aardvark

The aardvark is best known as the animal that comes first in the dictionary ...and the telephone book ...and the school register. Oh, how the aardwolf must have cursed! But there's much more to the aardvark than its alphabetical eminence.

Scene of the Slime

This is a dark and menacing rhyme about the revenge that the author plans for the slimy garden invaders that are eating all his plants.

Dinosaur School Days

I could have put this one in the school poetry section, but whilst there are hundreds of poems about school, poems about dinosaurs are almost extinct. There's only one other dinosaur poem on the site, but its so rude I'm going to leave you to find it for yourself.

Dinner Question

A funny poem about a misunderstanding between a husband and wife. Yes, it is an animal poem, but you have to wait until nearly the end for the appearance of the cat.

Frankly My Dear

Another joke in the form of a poem, but this time with a rather clever jokey title as well. If you can complete the famous quotation 'Frankly my dear I don't give a ....... ' from Gone with the Wind you (a) arrive at the punch line of the joke and (b) are much too old to be reading children's poetry.

Jim Pansy

Just the sort of animal poem that teachers adore. See if you can guess what sort of animal Jim Pansy is before all is revealed in the final line.

You Can't Teach An Old Cat Any Tricks

I had my cat Timmy firmly in mind when I wrote this poem. Although he clearly has a superior intellect, you could never train him to do anything. He is, however, happy to teach himself all sorts of useful tricks, such as catching squirrels or opening the fridge door when no-one is looking.

Davy Jones Disco

A funny poem which revolves around a glorious pun.

Huntin’ Shootin’ And Tippin’

A fippant verse about life in the countryside and two rather anti-social pastimes that take place there.

The Revenge Of The Crocodile

Crocodiles are sometimes the villains of the piece, killing people indiscriminately, and sometimes the victims, being killed and turned into handbags, shoes etc. So how would a crocodile extract its revenge?

Divide And Rule

A simple little rhyme about amoebae and their amazing reproductive abilities.

Bee and Bee

A humorous piece which contrasts the behaviour of two different bees, the bumble bee and the humble bee. Only after I finished the poem did I discover than humble bees and bumble bees are one and the same thing. Ooops, but it's still quite a fun pun poem.

The Girl Who Kicked The Hornets' Nest

From bees to hornets, and a poem by Max which is brilliant in its simplicity. It's just the sort of poem that appeals to boys who don't think they like poetry, because its short and silly, yet at the same time dark and slightly dangerous. It will also appeal to teachers because it's a great example of an onomatopoeia poem, but we'll leave the literary dissection until later.